Don’t Let Others Project Their Negativity Onto You

Who has never been criticized? All of us have been victims of people who were jealous of our job. Sometimes people are angry because of our behavior or because of who we are. But it also happens that they just feel bad and need to project their negativity onto someone else. Perhaps you too have experienced this situation.

Criticism can do us a lot of damage. It then depends on the day and how strong our self-confidence is at that moment. We sometimes manage to ignore it. But often it hurts or affects us. Yes, you are the only one responsible for how all that negativity they project on you affects you. Because you can’t control the behavior of others. But you can influence how much they touch you.

People who criticize you and project their negativity onto others say more about themselves

We are all different. Your best friend may not be touched by what others say to him, but you are. To change this, it is important that you learn to see the situation from the right perspective. Why would someone criticize you to hurt you? Perhaps that person is criticizing the things that actually reflect him.

We often project our insecurities and fears onto others. We fire needs like poison darts at others because they are not fulfilled or resolved. That way we try to feel better about ourselves. We don’t realize that instead of solving the problem, we are running away from it.

Whenever others project all that negativity onto you, remember that this is a defense mechanism. These people try to defend themselves against all those impulses, actions and thoughts. Because they don’t want to acknowledge that they are theirs. Their inner negativity makes them project these impulses onto you. That way they don’t have to take responsibility for their problems. They avoid acknowledging and resolving them.

Decide for yourself how you respond to criticism

Let’s take a daily example. Think of those romantic relationships in which one partner accuses the other of being unfaithful. However, there are no signs to support this suspicion. There are many explanations for this situation.

What actually happens in this case? The person making those accusations himself had these unfaithful thoughts. But he cannot accept them because he sees them as negative. The need to feel better makes him project his insecurity onto his partner. He transfers the fear of thoughts that he cannot handle to the other.

But what is important is indeed how you react to this. Will you let all that negativity he projects on you win? You may want that person to stay with you. In fact, you don’t want to do what the other expects of you. But you refuse to go against the other person because you are afraid that they will view you in a negative way. You are afraid that he will criticize you. Will you feel good if you don’t do what you want after all?

Learn how to prevent negativity

Sometimes it’s hard to keep calm with a person who doesn’t treat you the right way. But try to keep your composure anyway. Because it will be your best weapon to avoid the fears and insecurities of the other having an impact on you. That way you will also be able to better analyze the reasons that led him to act this way. In the best-case scenario, you can even get something positive out of it.

You know the best way not to worry too much about a situation like this? It may seem silly to you when we say that smiling helps, but you will find that it is an important tool. In a difficult moment, a smile can help us. Start putting it into practice today. You will find that any criticism or judgment will have much less emotional impact on you.

Criticism is just an opinion

At the same time, don’t forget that criticism is just an opinion. So it shouldn’t affect you too much. Because not everyone has the same view of a situation or an action. Also, how many times has it happened that someone criticizes you without really knowing you?

It is also very important that you pay attention to how the person who is criticizing you is behaving. People who project their needs or thoughts onto others are usually very emotional. Their words are full of emotions that make everything look much more serious than it really is.

If this is the case, then you are dealing with a person whose words are not meant for you but for themselves. His fears and insecurities are projected onto you. But the problem is not with you. You haven’t done anything wrong. He is afraid to accept the things he considers not right. However, it is those things that dominate his thoughts.

During your lifetime you will meet many people who fit this description. Many of them are toxic people who can’t just fill your life with negativity. But they also attack you with hurtful, harmful emotions and feelings. The best way not to let this happen is to stay calm and trust yourself. What they say is not always true. Sometimes it is the fruit of fear or discomfort within themselves.