Why Sleeping Beauty Should Not Wait For Her Prince

Once upon a time there was a Sleeping Beauty who would sleep for a hundred years. The sleeping beauty was enchanted, and only a prince’s kiss could awaken her from her sleep. He would be her ‘lifesaver’, the one who would free her from her slumber. And they? She would be waiting for him, completely dependent on him. But what happens if the prince never appears? What if the expected redemption is never fulfilled? And what does this fairy tale teach us about the delicate relationship between love and independence?

Many of today’s relationships follow the same pattern as Sleeping Beauty’s. Some of these sleeping beauty cling to a prince who never comes, remaining mere spectators in their own lives. Unless he shows up.

It seems as if these sleeping beauty need someone else to make them happy, to move them. Sometimes they find that ‘someone’, but then lose him again. They become so depressed that they seem to fall into a dream where they can enjoy nothing, where nothing makes sense if there is no loved one by their side.

Love and independence

There are enough sleeping beauty in the world. Women who are kissed by a ‘prince’ without actually having chosen this prince, without actually knowing whether they really want to receive the kiss. But as soon as his lips touch theirs, they cling to their savior. He is their straw and that deserves a reward after all, right? It wouldn’t be smart to dump him, because who says another prince will come along?

That’s when they truly bury themselves in a submissive relationship where they are eternally grateful for their “saving angel.” They dedicate themselves completely to him, owe him all their lives and rely on him for their happiness. Their life is perfect! Their love is forever! But it doesn’t take long for them to notice that something is wrong. Their prince doesn’t look at them like he did before, he seems to have gotten tired of them! Happiness is broken and all that remains is a painful, cruel reality.

Love turns to sorrow

This is when love turns to sorrow and it becomes a constant struggle to continue it. The sleeping beauty fights, gives everything, even humbles herself. But things aren’t what they used to be. She begins to wonder if her prince ever really wanted her. Maybe he just wanted to kiss her and she got carried away. She wonders what she did wrong. Maybe she should have made it harder, pretended she was asleep and even his kiss didn’t wake her up.

Sleeping Beauty has lost her identity; she has been dependent on her prince from the beginning. If he left her she would be nothing, after all she needed him to come back to life in the first place. The emotional dependence has caught her. Love is no longer synonymous with happiness, but rather with effort and suffering. She feels like she’s going to die every time her prince distances herself from her. It’s not fair, but it may even be necessary. Why? Because the sleeping beauty must wake up, but this time alone.

How Sleeping Beauty can wake up without her prince

What is it with all those princess stories that they make us believe that we need someone to be happy? That we are somehow incomplete. Today, of course, we know this as emotional dependence. A state in which we are nobody without the other. Our happiness, well-being and pleasure all depend on how the other person is and how he feels. Is that fair? And the other person never seems to suffer as much as we do!

Sleeping Beauty is tired of waiting for her prince and his overrated kiss. After all, waiting just shows that she doesn’t have much self-respect. That she is not able to confront life alone and that she cannot connect love and independence.

So what would happen if she stopped waiting and adjusting and just opened her eyes? Only then would she know how strong she really is. She would know that princes are not saviors and that she should not pin her hopes on them. Whether good or bad prince, he will get overwhelmed with all that responsibility and run away.

The pink glasses

It’s time to stop offering ourselves to the first person who comes to us, thinking that he will be our salvation. It’s time to stop thinking everything is perfect because we will suffer if things don’t go the way we hoped. We often put on rose-colored glasses, allowing us to see things the way we want to see them. We are afraid to turn these off and see things as they really are. We are afraid of connecting love and independence.

If the prince doesn’t show up, the sleeping beauty can die without ever waking up. This is something that unfortunately happens often. If that perfect relationship never happens, we are sad, we feel sorry for ourselves. We think that nobody loves us and that we are worth nothing. Wake up! How can you think you’re worth nothing? Why do you need someone else to see your own worth, to believe in yourself? Don’t you know that love and independence can also go together?

It’s time for Sleeping Beauty to wake up once and for all. That she will stop giving in and wait for princes who might one day turn into frogs! She has the right to choose the prince herself, she does not have to wait for him. She respects and values ​​herself, and she deserves the best.

Having someone by your side doesn’t mean your life will be better. Your life is already complete and full. Only when Sleeping Beauty realizes this can she awaken on her own. She will know that she does not need anyone, and this will enable her to truly love. She will discover that she is beautiful in herself. And of course, she lived happily ever after!