When Your Emotions Overwhelm You, Breathe

Our emotions are like an inner compass. They show us the way, and in most cases cause us to act in some way (not in every situation, of course, fear can be very paralyzing, for example). When your emotions overwhelm you, the most likely outcome is that you’re doing too much, which can negatively impact your confidence and self-confidence.

Achieving emotional balance is a process that requires practice and training. Imagine having to ride the roller coaster every day to feel motivated and free of emotional baggage. Emotional intensity may feel good in the moment, but the ups and downs can leave you completely exhausted at the end of the day. This emotional roller coaster is also likely to make you disoriented and start to question your life plans.

Why do your emotions overwhelm you?

Do you need to express every emotion intensely to feel alive? Emotional outbursts are often associated with drama or exaggeration, but this is not always the case. You may feel the need to express your emotions intensely because that’s the way you show how you feel, and/or you don’t know how else to do it.

Emotional intensity is also often seen in highly sensitive people who are very empathetic and who have the ability to always put themselves in someone else’s shoes. People who are deeply affected by everything may feel guilty, or may be very hard on themselves. It’s not always easy to be constantly overwhelmed by your emotions.

Emotions come and go in waves

Every emotion is valid and necessary for your development. They all have some kind of adaptive function. There are no good or bad emotions, and there are no better or worse ways to experience them. It’s important to allow yourself to feel every emotion, and to find a way to handle it better each time.

All emotions, no matter how intense they are, will pass if you just let them go. Emotions are like waves that come and go, and it’s important not to get caught up in the current. Look for the healthiest way to express your emotions so that you don’t drown in them.

Breathing is the key to changing your emotions

Our breath is the pillar that supports our emotions. The way we breathe determines the intensity of our emotions. It can even determine which emotions get the upper hand. For example, short, shallow breaths can send fear, discomfort, and anger. If, on the other hand, you sometimes consciously pause your breathing and exhale more air than you inhale through your nose, you will become calmer.

Nervousness, anxiety and stress can make you feel short of breath or cause you to breathe quickly and shallowly. Breathing slowly can put your body in a more relaxed state.

Learn to breathe when your emotions overwhelm you

If you want to learn to breathe through your intense emotions, the first thing you need to do is:

Identify bodily sensations

See if you feel a lump in your throat, a knot in your stomach or a tingling in your back…

Identify the emotions that cause this bodily sensation

Behind every physical sensation we experience, there can be four emotions hidden. Naming what happens to you can help give the experience meaning.

Breathe through the emotion and express the emotion

Give yourself the space to fully feel your emotion. Don’t try to control your emotions. This can lead to emotional suppression. By simply breathing, you already deal with your emotions in a completely different way.

If you feel any irritation, cool down and let it go without hurting yourself

Rather than allowing the frustration to pile up and eventually explode and you take your frustration out on others, give yourself some time to cool down. That way you can find a better way to express yourself.

If you feel the need to vent so that your feelings don’t get too overwhelming, there are plenty of ways to do it without hurting yourself. Squeezing a small pillow or towel or crushing a plastic bottle while thinking about what you’re so angry about are ways to channel your anger. The more concretely you are able to express your emotions, the better. The point is to use up the physical energy that holds this emotion.

A practical exercise to work with your breathing and emotions

Exhale (exhale slowly) is associated with relaxation. Inhalation (breathing in), on the other hand, is associated with stress and anxiety. Learning to breathe properly requires daily practice. You can divide this exercise into five steps:

• Breathe in normally through your nose with your mouth closed.
• Exhale slowly through your nose with your mouth closed.
• As you exhale, quietly and slowly repeat the word “calm” or “relax” (or any other word you find relaxing).
• Count slowly to four and then inhale again.
• Do this exercise several times a day, breathing in and out ten to fifteen times each time.

Practice makes perfect, and the more you practice, the easier it will be to maintain your emotions. In the future, you will no longer be overwhelmed by your feelings. Emotional balance is directly linked to learning how to use your emotions to communicate in healthy ways with both yourself and others.