Why Do Parents Abandon Their Children?

Child abandonment is a reality and the reasons behind this tragic phenomenon are as varied and unique as the people involved. While it is clear that nothing can be worse for a child, the factors that motivate the parents to do this are not always completely incomprehensible. So, why do parents abandon their children?

Poverty and scarcity of resources are often the most important factors. Some very young parents choose to put their children up for adoption. Or they hand them over to relatives. In that case, we’re not talking about abandonment or abandonment in a formal sense, although some people would probably see it that way.

Child abandonment is a multi-faceted problem. Each family’s triggers, situations, and realities are different and potentially traumatizing for the child.

The pain of this experience is deep and often permanent. Growing up without a father or mother leaves an emotional void that is almost impossible to fill. Let’s dig a little deeper into this.

Reasons why parents abandon their children

We’ve all heard dramatic true stories of tragedies you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy. Despite the fact that we live in an advanced society, child abandonment still occurs.

Newborn babies still appear in unexpected places. It’s the result of moms who just couldn’t take it anymore. They also did not have the support to raise a child.

No two situations are the same. Some are understandable, other situations are not. Anyway, they usually have at least one thing in common: the decision to abandon a child is not something impulsive.

Usually it is the dramatic conclusion of a long meditation and reflection process. Let’s take a look at the most common triggers.

Financial problems

Poverty, marginalization and lack of resources are common reasons why one or both parents would choose to abandon their child. In this case, it is crucial to identify the problem and act as quickly as possible to avoid these extremes.

Drug Abuse and Alcoholism

Drug abuse and social marginalization often go hand in hand. If one or both parents struggle with alcoholism, it can lead to very difficult circumstances for children as well. Children of alcoholic parents tend to experience two types of abandonment.

The first occurs at home through neglect and violence often associated with alcoholism. The second is physical abandonment when the parent actually leaves.

unwanted pregnancy

Unwanted pregnancies are another common reason for child abandonment. Rape is one possible factor, as is pregnancy in minors. Women and girls in these situations often feel alone and not sure what to do.

Every parent reacts differently to an unexpected pregnancy. While one parent is happy that a child is coming, the other is not ready at all. Sooner or later, they eventually choose to turn their backs on the situation altogether.

Immature parents who don’t want to be ‘stuck’

There are people who, when they become a parent, simply don’t have the emotional maturity to handle a child. After all, it’s a huge responsibility that you can hardly prepare for. Even if you consciously decide to have a baby, the reality of parenting can be completely overwhelming.

On average, children are more likely to be abandoned before they turn one, although of course it can happen at any time. Whether the child is three, five or ten years old, a parent can choose to run away and leave their responsibilities behind.

Relationship Difficulties: Abandonment as a Way to Start Over

If you want to have a good understanding of why children are abandoned, it’s important to also consider relationship problems as a possible cause.

Breakups, cheating, complicated divorce proceedings and conflicts over alimony and child custody sometimes become so overwhelming that a parent decides to leave.

These experiences are especially more difficult for children. Not only do they witness their parents’ conflicts, but they often feel that they are the cause of the problems or ultimately abandoned.

In many cases, the parent who leaves eventually finds a new mate and starts a new family. This is a whole different level of being abandoned. As bad as things are with a romantic partner, it’s still hard to understand that someone would decide to abandon their child.

In short, the reasons why parents abandon their children are complex and often objectionable. Obviously, there are some instances where you can understand the circumstances that lead to abandonment.

In other circumstances, however, there seems to be no just explanation. Be that as it may, we as a society must do everything we can to avoid these situations.

The absence of a parent leaves a void in a child’s life and a painful scar that lasts well into adulthood.